I have to admit, I am in a slump. I am feeling lost and honestly it is time to get my shit together. I am at my peak. I’m turning 22 this year and it is time for me to step up and be an adult. This past couple of weeks and month has been tough but recently, I’ve been trying to get better and stronger. A set back does not stop time although it seems like my life is in a pause. Get what i mean? I feel like my life is stagnant, dull and honestly…… Monotonous. That not how i should be spending my youth! i need to do something to get myself back on track. At this point, it’s all about self-love and getting better.
So what i have been doing recently is getting fit. Honestly, i would say i am mentally unhealthy. And this has translate into a physical form. So i could see my body just rotting away. I lost a lot of weight. My skin is a mess. I have a major hormone imbalance and i could clearly see it as my body is showing signs of it. I was just a mess. i could stay at home all day and do nothing at all and not feel like shit about it cos i already felt that way. So in order to get out of this vicious cycle, i had to take some measures.
One of it is working out and I swear this has created the most positive change in my life. I used to hate working out but now I feel like it is essential. Not only does it help regulate my hormones but it gives me a sense of drive and i feel amazing afterward. Honestly i really did not expect myself to like doing it. I’ve been pretty good about it and i make sure to workout every other day and stick to a good workout routine. It gives me energy and sweating it all out actually feels good. Not only that, i actually see some results on my body. Muscles are developing at areas I would like them to be. My body is more toned now and my skin has improved a lot ever since i starting working out.
Eating better is also part of it. I mean i do eat a lot but sometimes i don’t eat at all. I also don’t have the healthiest diet cos i dont really care about what i eat. I still dont care that much but i make sure i eat at the right time and the right amount. Making sure i eat all my meals and also increase my intake of fruits and vegetables.
Lastly, immersing myself at work. Now that I have a job, at least i got something to do in my life. I put my energy to it and just zone out during those hours. I feel good that I’m working cos i’m earning my own money and i feel like an adult cos i don’t depend on my parents anymore on these kind of things. i dont feel like a burden and i have money now. Even though currently i’m broke but heyyyy~ i’ll get back the money again next month.
So that’s what I’ve been doing recently that has given has really helped me out. Now that i have a lot more alone time, i start to think a lot. I need to depend on myself more. I need to bring my own happiness and i need to be even more independent now since I’m the only one looking out for myself. There’s still a lot of things to think about like what i wanna do in after i graduate, uni, my career path and all that stuff. I can’t sit around anymore and stay wherever i am and not progress. People are moving forward and i need to start moving too.
utterlyamani 