Monthly Archives: January 2014

Goodbye 2013 and Hello 2014!

tumblr_lx3lohTq101r1urdmo1_500[1]I know it’s a little late to do a “Goodbye 2013 and Hello 2014” post but, it’s still January and many things happened during 2013 that I would like to share it with you guys. Also, I wanted to share my new year’s resolution or what I’m planning to do in 2014. So let’s get started.

2013 was a really rocky year. Might not be so eventful but it was definitely rocky and a tough year. From the start of the year, it was really challenging. I had a really tough time trying to figure out what i wanna do in the future and what was my plan. For starters, i didn’t tell you guys this but i actually retook my ‘O’ levels. I didn’t get my desired grades and i couldn’t go to the course which i wanted. So i decided to retake my O’s so that i could go to a good school and a good course. Honestly i didn’t know whether that was the right decision because in my head, retaking my O’s was a shameful thing to do and it meant that i’m a failure. I know it’s a stupid thing to have thought of but that was how i genuinely felt about it. And also, I was quite embarrassed to tell people that i was retaking my O’s since everyone else that i knew was moving on to their next chapter in life while i was stuck in the same position for another year. That’s how i felt in the start. It was tough. I was pretty much a stupid girl to have thought of it that way. Of course as the year started to pass, my thoughts of it changed. I felt less embarrassed about it and i wasn’t afraid to tell people what i was doing. My mindset about it changed and i felt that i shouldn’t care about what others thought about it. I should just be proud of it. I mean it’s my life and i couldn’t care less about what others think. And thank god i retook my O’s cos i got a good score in the end and i was eligible to go to many different courses.  Sometimes you don’t know whether you have made the right decisions and you are constantly worrying whether it’s right. However, you have to remember to always be confident about the decisions make and have faith in yourself.

Friends have definitely helped me get through the year. They encouraged me to do better, supported me in whatever i did and helped me become a better person. I have to admit, I’m a pretty bad person and friend. well at least that’s what i think. But I’m slowly changing and trying or in the process of becoming a better person.e7253a9d1ca84ccfbcb1ace2de8393de@2x

One person i’d like to mention in Zhi En who has been with me all the time. She gives me so much encouragement and energy and i can’t even thank her enough for that. And i know i can trust her. She’s got my back and I got her’s. Also i wanna mention Ballery.28d383dca57511e1bf341231380f8a12_7

She is crazy and wild but also so caring and so understanding. If i got problem, she gives my the best advises and i trust her. She’s so young but mature for her age. I mean i remember when i was 16 and i was still playing my psp. i was so childish. There are still many others who support me and i love you guys. And i’m sorry if i didn’t mention you here but of course you’re still included. OH! I wanna mention Carissa who has been supporting me all this time even though she’s so far away. I MISS YOU SO MUCH CAR!!20120414-140142

In 2013, we got a new addition to my family. Meet Pablo. He’s our cat!!Processed with VSCOcam with t1 preset

And he is the cutest cat in the world. We adopted him in 4th June and he has given my family and I such joy and happiness. I love him so much and he just the best. When I’m having a really bad day, he would just shower me with cuteness and love. he just make all my problems and sadness disappear.

Okay on to my 2014 plans cos this post is getting really long.

  •  to get into a good course in school and do well in it of course.
  • Make my parents happy and proud. This really important.
  • Be more adventurous.
  • Gain new experience
  • WordPress more often.

Hopefully i can stick to it and make 2014 a good year.

So that’s all i have to say. goodbye 2013! you have been great and HELLO 2014!!

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The Future

The future is really scary. And for me, I am given a task to decide my future in 2 days. honestly, I don’t know what i wanna do in the future or who i wanna be. this makes me even more scared. What if i make the wrong choice? what if 10 years down the road i will regret my decision just because i don’t know what i wanna do now. Everyone in this world have their own ambitions. I wanted to be a doctor. Specifically, a pediatrician. But for a long time, I’ve neglected my ambitions because i was too busy caring about other things and i was so overwhelmed by my studies. It  was to the point where I had lost confidence in it and question whether i could achieve it.

My result came and i got a okay. it was not too bad but it was not too good either. Honestly, i didn’t feel anything. i wasn’t happy or sad. i was just numb. However my results were not good enough to go where i wanted to go to. i’ve been doing nothing but research on which school to go to, which course to apply to and most importantly, what would my future be like if i apply to a specific course. and let me tell you it is tiring. And it is making my whole brain messed up.

Now, I’m so confused. I’m so lost. I don’t what to do or who to turn to. I guess it’s because it’s my own decision and it’s my own life, but i really don’t know. It’s all blank to me. everything is not clear.